The Sandal

Thomas stayed home sick last Friday and asked me to stay home with him. After his mother walked out the door at about 6:45, we looked at each other and smiled and let the wild rumpus begin. We played and played and played and finally came inside for lunch and a nap. While we were winding down getting ready to head into his room he started throwing stuff around the family room, which is usually a sign that it's time to head back there. He threw a number of things around including my sandals, which is pretty standard. Every time we put him down, I walk back around the house and try to pick up the trail of debris left in his wake.

We read Go Dog Go two or ten times and finally, he fell asleep. I cleaned up some of the toys and went outside to do yard work. I found one sandal by the front door and then spent a good 20 minutes tearing the rest of the house apart looking for the other one. I looked under the couches, in drawers, in his tent, behind the bookshelf, in the basement, in the garage, in the damn fridge. I looked everywhere except his room because he was sleeping.

He woke up a few hours later and as soon as I went into his room, I took his paci and turned off his sound machine and asked him if he had seen my sandal. I looked everywhere and I am telling you people it was not in his room. I got him out of his crib, and for the 4th time, began my search of the house again. He followed me around while he continued to wake up. "Sonny, have you seen my sandal... Did you hide dada's sandal? Look, this is a sandal, have you seen the other one? Sonny, Dad doesn't do well with conundrums, so help me find my sandal, okay?"

And just like that he took off and ran to the back of the house. I heard him rummage around for a minute, while I slashed the couch cushions open with a knife, looking for this freaking thing.

He ran back in the room with a big smile, and that little stinker was holding my sandal.

"SANNAL!"

He's thieving and hoarding at 18 months. At least one of those things is a felony. We'll all be lucky if he hasn't opened up some pacifier black market before he starts school. I don't know what kind of criminal mastermind we're dealing with here, but I advise you folks to keep a close eye on this one.